Grasp
by Jazyrha
Summary: Reach. Grasp. Get it back. Try to get his life back. Cry. Break. Shatter. Shake. He won't listen to you anyway. /Kyouya-centered. Character death. Please review./


**Grasp.**

Give it back. Get his life back. Get his smile back. Get it back. You have to get it back.

Cry.

Shiver.

Shake.

Scream.

_(Reach. Oh, please, reach.)_

You have to get it back. You have to get the control back. You'll have to get it back.

Don't let them see the pain behind your eyes. Don't let them see what you are.

Don't let them see you've lost it.

Lose your mind.

Lose your hope.

Lose your heart.

_(Reach out, you idiot, grasp it, grasp it, try to get it back.)_

Remember why you're crying. Remember why your legs refuse to work. Remember it is all your fault.

_(Your fault.)_

Your own fault.

Try and reach. Reach for something you can't get back anymore.

The strings of absolute control only left your hands for seconds.

And now you're broken. Now you're just as lost as the control you once had.

Don't tell yourself you could've saved him.

_(Don't lie.)_

Don't lie to his cold smile.

Shake.

Break.

Die.

_(Die before you lived.)_

Hear it shatter. Hear your heart hit the ground, shatter in thousand of pieces. Hear the sound of your own pathetic screaming.

Hear how you can't say a word.

_(Oh, my. Aren't you useless?)_

Don't believe it.

Don't believe the lies.

Shake your head, brace yourself against the pain.

Freeze the dreams and melt the pain.

You'll be fine.

_(You won't. Never again.)_

You never needed his smile. You never needed him to be alive. You never loved him anyway.

Don't cry.

Don't cry because he would've wanted you to smile.

Stay calm. Stay collected. Stay yourself.

Don't think back of the way he screamed, before his bones were crushed underneath that car. Don't think back of the way his smile didn't disappear, but was only hidden under the blood.

Oh, God.

Don't think "I should've died instead," because you're not alive anyway.

Don't touch his face. Don't feel the cold.

_(Why?)_

_(Why do you have to hurt yourself this much?)_

Why can't you just walk away?

No.

_(No!)_

Don't say it.

Don't whisper it to his dead body. Don't scream it for his deaf ears to ear.

No.

**- I love you -**

Why did you do it?

_(Why are you so useless?)_

You couldn't even save him. You have no right to tell him this now.

God.

_(Shut up.)_

Don't tell him.

He should hate you. But he won't. He won't do anything anymore.

Don't tell him you regret it now.

Don't tell him this now.

**- I love you -**

_(Just die.)_

Why don't you just die yourself? You don't even have the right to look upon his cold face.

You couldn't even save him.

You can't save anyone.

_(Why don't you just cry?)_

_(Why don't you admit that it hurts?)_

Stop pretending.

Break. Shatter. Cry. Scream.

Oh, please.

Don't stay so calm. Don't stay so emotionless. Don't do this. Don't kill yourself like this.

_(Or is this the only thing you know?)_

Is this all you can do?

Don't you hate yourself already?

Wash the blood of your face. Wash his blood of your hands. Wash. Wash.

Just erase him.

Just kill him.

Just cut him out of your memory.

You never loved him anyway.

_(Could you stop it? Could you stop lying to yourself?)_

Tell his family you're sorry.

_(Don't be.)_

Hate yourself.

You don't have the right to do this. You didn't save him. You didn't even try.

_(Don't tell yourself you couldn't do anything.)_

You could at least cry.

You could scream.

You could faint.

You could follow him.

_(No. You can't.)_

Don't look back. Just walk away. Don't even think about going back and saying it to him.

It's too late now.

It's already too late.

You had your change and you blew it.

You always destroy everything.

You always kill everything you love.

_(Why?)_

Don't!

Don't. Please, don't.

You don't have to make it so hard. You don't have to care. You don't need to walk back.

He won't listen anymore.

There's no point in screaming like you're doing now.

He'll never listen anymore.

Don't scream it. Don't fall onto your knees.

Don't…

Don't reach for the darkness ahead. Don't reach for the pain. Don't reach for him.

Because he won't come back.

He will never come back.

_(Why are you so useless?)_

Grit your teeth. Shut your eyes closed.

Come on.

Fight it. Fight the pain.

_(Why couldn't you tell him?)_

_(Why did you let him go?)_

Ssh. Don't make so much noise.

No…

No.

No!

Don't scream it so loud. Can't you hear you voice won't go louder then a pathetic whisper?

**- I love you-**

He never listened anyway.

* * *

Okay then. I honestly have no idea where this came from. I don't even know what this is about. Well the 'you' person is Kyouya. That's all I know XD Other then that, you can decide who died. Awh. I'm so mean for killing someone.

Ah, well.

I hope it was good.

**Please review!**

-Jazyrha-


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